Come One, Come All to The Horrible Vampire Circus

Now in barbie pink!

Vampire Circus is a great movie!

If you can get past the bad effects, the obvious staging, and on more than one occasion your immersion being ruined by the fact you mentally say to yourself:

"Oh look, modern light fixtures in Early Central Europe!"

So Cheesy

The basic plot is that there is a borderline pedophiliac vampire named "Count Mitterhaus". The good count likes to seduce women, and have them help his pervert little self to lure little girls (And boys) into his home so he can touch them lovingly before killing them.

Once finished with this, he likes to then roll around on top of, and be rolled around on top of, naked with said older female. Notice I said 'roll around with' there is no way that was supposed to be a sex scene, unless you have sex in the shape of a letter T, I know I don't.

Moving on, the villagers are rightly mad about this and all before the first fifteen minutes are up the count is dead and cursing the village.

Fifteen years later the curse seems to be coming true and while the town is in a panic, the circus comes to town bent on entertaining the people of town...and more.

Some Vampires Should Stay Dead

With Animals, Games, Midget Clowns, oh... and vampires.

Now, let me be clear before I start my review.

A review by its very nature are statements of opinion when it comes to the movie itself, and no one can like 'every vampire movie ever made'.

This and other movies from the 'Hammer' production house all seem to be very low budget movie creations.

Hammer a near crazed cult following of this production house I am going to be hard pressed to completely negate a lot of the good press that this movie receives.

Vampire Circus is was made in 1972, and I have seen better effects in the 1950's and 1960's. Not only that, the writing was better too.

This particular rendition of vampires that have easily one and a half inch long fangs, so long in fact the actors and actresses have trouble opening their mouth wide enough to have them fully shown.

Combine this with the unconvincing acting through most of the movie, and at best, flimsy dialogs and you get a very poor movie.

Panthers in Central Europe have Teeth as Long As A Baby Leg!

You will find that the makeup is very well done, and that there is a plot under all the trash. Though, while I cannot recommend it for effects, acting, or even comedic value.

The wardrobe department did a fantastic job, but the effects people needed to try a little harder beyond wounds and corpses, the effects were simply not there.

I am not spoiled by big budget movies; the classics have a special place in my heart. But when I get better effects from a movie 20 years older, I have to wonder if they are even trying.

If you are looking for an older, classic vampire movie; go see Dracula or Nosferatu.

But if you want campy 70's effects with a mediocre plot and your vampires to look like late 70 early 80's glam rockers than Vampire Circus is for you.

Glam Rocker, or Vampire?
But if you like Hammer movies, or any movie that could sue Kraft for false advertising (Because THIS is the Cheesiest) You can Purchase Vampire Circus as a 2 Disk DvD/Blu-Ray Combo! You can keep one and give another to someone you hate. If you really must own it though, go the cheap route and download it direct from Amazon.

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